A big reason for divorce--or, at least, a very unhappy marriage--having a very good chance of becoming part of ones future happens even before the marriage takes place.
What I'm talking about is marrying for "the wrong reasons."
Some things (and there are even more than these) that would fall under the category of "the wrong reasons" are as follows:
buying into the idea that marriage is something that "good" people do, so you set out to get married because you want to be married instead of because you've found someone you want to marry
getting married on the rebound while still carrying the torch for someone else whom you believe you "should" get over and go about "getting on with your life"
getting married to someone of the opposite sex in order to become "healed" from being gay
marrying someone--even while having a gut-feeling that this person isn't truly "the one"--because all of your friends think that you and this person make such a wonderful couple
marrying someone mainly because you want to keep or create an image of belonging to a certain segment of society, and this person is a means to make this happen
marrying someone because you've been together for so long that you've already invested too many months/years in the relationship (even if it's a very bad relationship) just to leave and start over again
getting married because you're afraid of growing old and lonely
getting married based on some physical characteristic (e.g. large breasts. toned muscles) while not getting to know the person's personality traits
getting married to someone in hopes of changing him/her to fit your image of the ideal spouse
getting married because you went too far and lost your virginity, so this is the only way to "make it right"
getting married because the two of you have created a child together even though your main interest in each other is more of a lustful nature than a loving nature
getting married because you think there's something wrong with you NOT to want to marry such a wonderful person--even though your heart is telling you that you aren't in love with this person but are just in a comfortable, positive, but platonic relationship.
Ainsley Jo Phillips
What I'm talking about is marrying for "the wrong reasons."
Some things (and there are even more than these) that would fall under the category of "the wrong reasons" are as follows:
buying into the idea that marriage is something that "good" people do, so you set out to get married because you want to be married instead of because you've found someone you want to marry
getting married on the rebound while still carrying the torch for someone else whom you believe you "should" get over and go about "getting on with your life"
getting married to someone of the opposite sex in order to become "healed" from being gay
marrying someone--even while having a gut-feeling that this person isn't truly "the one"--because all of your friends think that you and this person make such a wonderful couple
marrying someone mainly because you want to keep or create an image of belonging to a certain segment of society, and this person is a means to make this happen
marrying someone because you've been together for so long that you've already invested too many months/years in the relationship (even if it's a very bad relationship) just to leave and start over again
getting married because you're afraid of growing old and lonely
getting married based on some physical characteristic (e.g. large breasts. toned muscles) while not getting to know the person's personality traits
getting married to someone in hopes of changing him/her to fit your image of the ideal spouse
getting married because you went too far and lost your virginity, so this is the only way to "make it right"
getting married because the two of you have created a child together even though your main interest in each other is more of a lustful nature than a loving nature
getting married because you think there's something wrong with you NOT to want to marry such a wonderful person--even though your heart is telling you that you aren't in love with this person but are just in a comfortable, positive, but platonic relationship.
Ainsley Jo Phillips
March 15, 2013
